Monday, 9 June 2008

A picture speaks and spiritual guide

If a photo could talk, this is what it would say
Aaron, who applied for a dramaturg and choreographer in my project, made me realize that the words that I am using are really important and so I decided I should work on what I am saying. And what I am saying should be in close connection to the War Photography issue so as to be a performing element of the "old" choreography I have made as a "famous" choreographer.
So, being almost in the end of my lecture where I am talking that photos echo photos and that we only remember photos and not real incidents, I wanted to make a small conclusion of the whole lecture. So I ended up with this text:

For me, this is what the photo would say to us if it could speak.

Controling the masturbation- Performing the masturbation
Well, I have decided that I have used "masturbation" as a creative process and in a sense it is, if we see it as an expression of solipsism, it is the common element of the performance lecture mode.
But I have decided I should keep a distance from the character who is masturbating. I should be able to control it and master it. The performance should be a self-indulgent performance to fit in the format of performance lecture, but I should be able to make a comment on this self-indulgence instead of allowing it to overcome me. And to make a comment for me can only happen if I master it.
That's why I have thought of working today on another studio, and in fact on a studio where everyone can see me. Can I keep myself inside me? Can I be so internal forgetting the others?

The whole Laban could look at me. I was in this fish-bowl room where performing is like being inside a window shop, being looked at by possible buyers. I couldn't allow myself to be in a trance. I could perform trance if I wanted (and I clearly knew how to do it) but I wanted to check out if I could refrain from it.
In fact, I did. I also managed not to be "over" self conscious of the people looking at me. And that really worked fine. Here is what I managed to do.

Spiritual Guide
Today, I took a private class on voice mastering with Fabio Culora. Amazing guy. After some basic exercises on breathing he introduced me to voice as a movement not as a sound.

We did some exercises on posture, diaphragm but mainly we realized that there are two things that are important for me: (a) do less and (b) know my intentions.
Do less because sometimes I think that the voice is more than what I can whereas when I release my effort the voice just comes out on its own. I need to feel my base, my knees soft, release my belly and allow the sound to go out only to come back to me. I need to feel the rebound or the reverbaration in me.
When I knew my intention, my voice was clear and my breath more than enough to control the voice. It's all about presence Fabio explained me and we worked on me feeling comfortable with myself. More than that, he made me understand more precisely what my intentions on the text are and to express those through my movement-voice. I need to know what to emphasize. I also need to make the sound syncopated and clean.

By the end of the class, I was feeling I had made a big difference in the way I was approaching my breath, voice, presence and strength. Fabio is a great guy to encourage you to discover unhidden paths in you and to feel comfortable with yourself. I have thus asked him if he would be interested in being my spiritual guide for this piece and he has agreed. He will thus help me warming up, feeling comfortable with my body, relaxing and releasing and connecting me to my presence and intentions before the performance. I feel much stronger knowing that I have someone who can prepare me for this lonely journey I am taking. I am very grateful to my guide and I feel like a hobbit who found his young Gandalf.
For the next rehearsals, I know what I need to work on to make my voice and presence stronger. I will do my best Fabio.

I am realizing that maybe for the next days, I won't have a lot of things to say on creative process, since I only working on cleaning and correcting some bits and pieces. However, this process helps me to identify clearly some elements of the performance that I hadn't really thought about. I don't know what I should be writing these days. Maybe I just give you some idea of what I am cleaning and then you can tell me what I might have forgotten or haven't thought at all about cleaning or methods of cleaning to make my work easier.
A man cleaning up after the Israeli helicopter bombings in the Gaza Strip.
His house in the Northern Gaza Strip was shelled.

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